Stupid Sh*t Yall Believe

There are quite a few things that annoy me. That's part of the reason I put the title "Hate" in my blog. Well the main reason actually.

Most of the stuff I hate comes from dumb ass people. Most of these dumb ass people don't read. They rely on other people who don't read to tell them stuff or the news and media who create hype over things to get viewers or for whatever reason.

There are a lot of things that you guys believe in that just isn't true..but here are the three that bother me the most

Stupid Belief 1: Colds come from cold air

Here are a couple of scenarios:

Stupid Person 1: My throat feeling kinda itchy and my nose is runny. Probably because I forgot to put my hat on when I went out yesterday.

Stupid Person 2: Ugh, summer colds are the WORST. I probably got it from having the air conditioner too high

-_-

Now I know back in the day before they allowed us Negros to read, we had no choice but to come up with our own conclusions about stuff. So in the winter time when we caught colds the most, we naturally assumed it's because of the cold weather.

Well now we have access to books and science. A cold is a virus. Viruses come from other people and contaminated surfaces. Cold air does NOT bring on a cold. You can run outside butt naked for 2 hours and not "catch a cold" unless someone comes and sneezes their germs in your face.

Colds happen more frequent in the winter or when it's cold out because you are indoors more around sick people. I'll throw something extra in about colds. Cold medicine and vitamin C does not cure a cold virus. You have to let the cold run it's course. Cold medicine only suppresses the symptoms of a cold until it goes away.

The only way to prevent a cold virus is to become a hermit, stay home and never interact with anyone or anything. I know I'll feel better if your dumb ass stays home.

Stupid Belief 2: Pork is worse for you than any other meat

This may bother me the most. How can anyone put down my precious, PRECIOUS meat? Pork is awesome and delicious. Also, there is nothing stupider than a person who refuses to eat pork cause it's bad for you, but will eat the shit out of some fried chicken. Yeah, that makes sense.

Part of the reason pork gets the bad rap is because last century there was an outbreak of people getting sick from Trichinosis(or some shit). I don't have the exact details and I won't bore you with them in this post (feel free to Google...oh I forgot, you guys don't research). Just know that people got trichinosis and started fearing pork. Same thing happen with beef when mad cow disease broke out. Trichinosis comes from consuming raw or under-cooked pork. You would also get sick from eating under-cooked chicken and beef as well. But y'all haven't eliminated those from your diet permanently.

Pork can be just as healthy for you as any other meat depending on the cut and how it's cooked.

And yes, Bacon is bad for you, but if you stopped eating it everyday and only enjoy it sometimes, it wouldn't give you a heart attack. But that fried chicken will.

The other reason y'all stopped eating pork is this Muslim bandwagon that Black folk decided to jump on in an effort to NOT identify with the white man. But that's too much to get into right now. Just know the other reason y'all don't eat pork is because y'all listened to y'all Muslim friends about how pork will make God hate you because it's SOOOOOOO unclean. By the way, does your Muslim friend put down those fried chicken wings to pray for the 3rd time that day?

Funny how y'all are so selective about what to put in your body. Pork is bad for you so you don't eat it, but you go to the bar and chug down 5 gallons of liquor and buffalo wings. You're not impressing people with your declaration that you don't eat pork, you're only depriving yourself from it's goodness and you're still going to die. Oh, that leads up to the next stupid thing y'all believe.....

Stupid Belief 3: Death comes in threes

You know what else comes in threes? Sneezes and Farts.

I don't even know where this bullshit came from. Every time a celebrity dies, twitter always hollering about how death comes in threes, and waits patiently for 2 more famous people to die. What's worse is when a family member dies, and people start saying the same stupid ass saying. Like really, you can't just offer your condolences?

Let me tell you why this is stupid.

First, it says that famous people are the only people that matter on twitter. Second, people die all the damn time. A more accurate statement would be that death happens in infinity or some other stupid lame shit. Third.... never-mind a third reason, just stop saying this stupid shit.

You know what, I may be wrong about all this. Perhaps a person will die from not running outside naked in 30 degree weather and not taking cold medicine. Then another will die from eating that nasty ass pork that God hates. A third will die because for some unknown reason it's in the cosmos. When that happens, I will take all this back I said in this post and I will be the one looking stupid. But right now it's you imbeciles that  look stupid refuse to read and get your head out of your ass.

I Wish I Was Born a Man

No, this isn't one of those "I'm a gay man trapped in a woman's body" posts. This post is about my jealousy towards men. I have over the years, developed a penis envy.

Men love to complain about all the "problems" they have in life. Baby momma drama (that they bring on themselves by the way, but this post isn't about stupid places to stick your dangalang), finding a decent wife, which fraternity to join, which university to attend will get them the most ass, are they tall enough for the ladies, why won't their beard grow.....and the list goes on *rolls eyes*

Oh, it's not like we don't sympathize with your problems. .....well, actually, WE DON'T.

Please spare us. Men have it MADE out here in these streets. And if I wasn't so cheap, and didn't want to damage my kids psychologically, I would strongly consider going thru the change and becoming one of you very fortunate creatures. My reasons why I want to be a man?..let's see.

1. Men don't have a Period - I don't even need to go into details about this one. Who the hell enjoys bleeding and wearing a mattress or wad of cotton in your crotch every month for most of your life. I think most women get a good 10 - 12 years mattress free. Then here comes Aunt Flo, our most annoying visitor. Nothing that men go through compares to the cramps, bloating, fatigue etc that comes from our monthly cycle. So yeah, we may be faking the mood swings, but cut us some gyat damn slack. You don't know what it's like to have a crime scene in your draws every month for  a week....and no not wiping your ass properly is not a crime..though it should be.

2.  Men don't have to give birth - What's worse than having a mattress between your ass for a week every month? Having to carry and push a human being out of the same area. The pain, the nausea, the aggravation the looking like you swallowed a watermelon. Then that thing has to come out of WHERE?!?!? No it is not a "wonderful experience". That's some bullshit women tell each other so we can continue to procreate and populate the planet. We won't even talk about the fact that after we endure all of the above and bring forth your offspring that men have the option to ROLL OUT SCOTT FREE and do this to another woman. Matter of fact I will talk about it in the next paragraph. If it weren't for the clitoris, which sole purpose is for sexual pleasure, and breasts that we get to fondle whenever we feel like it, the planet would have died off long ago.

3. Men don't have to amount to anything and still be desired - This is probably the biggest reason I have envy towards men. No matter how much a dude has fucked his life over, there is some desperate woman that will want him. And in-between those women, mom dukes will take care of you for no reason. I have seen the dirtiest, deadbeat dad-est men on the face of the earth STAY with a damn girlfriend. Dudes that live in their momma basement do so because they don't have to move out on their own. For one, their mom let's them live there, two, some low self esteem of a woman will be willing to sneak into momma's basement to "chill" with said homeboy and later move him in her own home that she pays for..cause you know....she wants a "man". I find myself really jealous of a dude who can have 5 baby momma's and get the new ho pregnant with the 6th and somehow have her convinced this time it's "different" and they have "changed". Meanwhile, men in the same situation just mentioned have the nerve to set standards. I Hate that the scrub can get a woman with degrees that has all her shit together, but a woman has to get 7 degrees and her cooking skills has to rival Chef Ramsey just to be a man's fuck buddy.

Men you have it easy. I would love to have the problem of waking up everyday and deciding what desperate woman I'm going to fuck and get to wash my draws and then deciding if I want to be successful or not cause really I don't have to cause I can still get woman. Oh and also if I'm going to father my kids or hang out at the strip club again.

Decisions, decisions...........

Okay, let me go check on the penis I'm trying to grow in a petri dish

YOU SUCK IN BED!!!!

I usually write on a whim, after a twitter rant or checking some wack person on twitter.

Today there were multiple discussions regarding sex.

I learned that some people won't kiss but will perform oral sex.

There are women who don't like receiving oral sex nor performing it.

Women who don't swallow and women who don't like Doggy Style.

I also learned some dudes don't let women sit on their face or even like performing oral sex on a woman.

I have met men who claim their penis is so good, they don't "need" to perform oral on a woman.

-_____________-

Let me tell you. If you agree with any of the above, you are, in fact, WACK IN BED.

Yes. If you think your penis or vagina is enough, you my dear are TERRIBLE IN BED.

I'm not even talking about hoing, I'm speaking of people who do this shit even in relationships.

I don't care how much moaning and groaning the person you are screwing is doing or how long they have been in a relationship with you. Either they are cheating on you or they don't care about sex. Either way. YOU SUCK IN BED.

If you never kiss your sex partner, YOU SUCK IN BED. How can you be really into the sex act if you are avoiding someone's face the whole damn time. Yeah there are certain positions that don't require having that face time, but if you give NO FACE TIME, it's probably because you are wack or BAD IN BED.

If you stroke a woman and flip her, smack her ass but NEVER put your mouth on her body except maybe to suck a tittie for 2 seconds....YOU SUCK IN BED.

You love pussy, but you can't stand one in your face??? YOU SUCK IN BED!!!

You like dick but you don't smile at it, admire it and look at it longingly before putting in your mouth, YOU SUCK IN BED.

You can't be giving your partner mediocre sex out here. You think those things mentioned above aren't required because your partner has been dealing with you for a long time or is even in a relationship with you, chances are, THEY ARE CHEATING ON YOU. So yeah, your partner doesn't "need" head from you, cause most likely he/she is getting it somewhere else.

They aren't with you cause of the sex. Perhaps you raise their kids as your own, help them with bills, let them use your car or borrow your playstation, but they are NOT WITH YOU cause of the sex.

Step your sex game up. Watch some porn or something. Learn how to turn him/her out in the bedroom, cause your vagina or penis just ISN'T enough, no matter what you think.

Hmph

Twitter Hiatuses are stupid

I appreciate all the people I follow. I follow so many different types. I follow women, men. Intellectuals, dumbasses. Older and wise, Young and dumb. Old and dumb and Young and wise. I follow career folk and people who are just getting by. I follow parents and non parents. Married and single. All different types. I follow them all for a reason.

They're entertaining.

My day wouldn't be complete if I couldn't log onto twitter to vent. It would be almost impossible to not log onto twitter and be nosey about who said what, what topics people are discussing and who is flirting with who.

Of course I have a few favorite tweeters. These people keep me sane, keep me laughing. Another may *ahem* excite me.

Either way. I like them all. And I look foward to reading their tweets daily.

I understand twitter ain't for everybody. I also understand that some people are just too busy to be all up on twitter. And for others, twitter ain't as fun so they fall back dramatically. They just kinda disappear from twitter. Then you have tweeps who just happen to have real life shit going on and can't tweet right now.

What I don't understand are people who tweet like shit one day, then disappear for weeks. But before leaving announce they are "Taking a break from twitter"

:-|

I have said that myself, usually in jest or when I'm in a funky mood. I never mean it tho. Some people mean it.

I don't really understand the reasoning behind leaving twitter for a while for no real reason. Of course, when my favorite followers do this, I get perturbed and try to figure out what's going on.

1. They need a twitter break because other people's lives make them feel like shit - There is no doubt that people use twitter to brag about their life. They use twitter to get attention.. This can make the average broke person like myself feel like shit if you don't know the real shit about life and you don't know that people are assholes who lie or exaggerate cause they themselves have low self esteem. If you left twitter because you feel like your life is some shit, man up. Don't believe everything you read on twitter and don't think you aint shit cause someone appears to have it going on.

2. They smashed one of their followers and are embarrassed because that follower is hardly tweeting them any attention - smashing someone you follow isn't for the faint of heart. If you are super soft or think everyone you give the goods to should like you and want to be with you, you are sadly mistaken and are completely doomed. So you thought you could handle that person you smashed tweet's. You thought that the flirting with their other followers wouldn't bother you. You were wrong. Now you have to take some time off twitter cause your heart is broke and you feel like an asshole.

3. You are so thirsty for attention you want people to miss you - I miss my followers that go on these stupid, wimpy hiatuses. But most don't. Most won't miss you. Just stay your ass on twitter and stop being an attention whore..I mean....you know what I mean (since technically being on twitter makes you an attention whore). These are the tweeps that normally announce they are leaving twitter for a while. BOO FUCKING HOO

4. You only tweeted at work any way - I hate you tweeters. Fake ass tweeters. Nah for real. Some people mostly tweeted to kill time at work. And that's cool. I understand you don't really have any work at your govt job so you can do that. Of course, your job decides to either get on you about your tweeting or they have blocked twitter. Your tweet counts and appearances go down DRAMATICALLY and you appear to be on hiatus. They usually don't announce they are leaving twitter, I brought them up because they are fake tweeters anyway lol. Not really into twitter.

Those are just a few reasons I think lames purposely take twitter breaks. I'm trying to figure out if you think twitter will suffer without your tweets. I'm trying to further figure out why you are letting a bunch of nobodies dictate how you feel about yourself or when you tweet.

Why you even taking a hiatus from twitter? What's the real fucking reason? Cause "I need a break" means some shit has happened and your self esteem won't let you tweet right now cause twitter lies and falsehoods makes you feel worse about yourself.

Whatever....grow some balls. I sell some on Etsy for 9.99....that's for that low low. Homemade balls

Are "Hoodrats" Evolving?

Months ago I wrote a post on respecting the hood chick. I got tired of people putting down women from the hood and generalizing them, making them out to be these crazy, deranged, box cutter in the mouth, disease infected, baby momma drama women. I listed a few positive things about women from the hood. It was part jest and part truth.

Apparently not many read my post. Even less agreed with it. Women from the hood still get a bad rep. They are still seen as tacky, loud, will cut you in a heartbeat women who's whole life is to get pregnant by you and embarrass you to no end. When a Black woman commits a crime, it's automatically assumed she is a "hoodrat" with no home training. The woman who committed the crime had to have grown up in poverty, doesn't want to improve her lifestyle and insists on keeping it gangsta by committing these crimes.

One of the biggest assumptions about "hood" women is that they will cut you in a heartbeat. For some reason, scary Black men think that women from the hood walk around armed with knives in between their bras, legs, vagina and let's not forget the mouth.

If you watch the news, you have probably seen the stories involving young Black women committing crimes. There was the Lululemon trial, the girl who stabbed and killed the other girl and University of Maryland at Eastern Shore, and recently, the Frostburg stabbing that ended in murder as well.

The first think a lot of people thought is "HOLE UP....THESE GIRLS ARE IN COLLEGE, WHAT ARE THEY DOING ?"

I vented about it on twitter early one morning (surprise).

I felt it was time to stop always assuming the girl who stabs another and commits petty crimes is some hood rat hooked on drugs or has no home training. I mean, college girls stabbing each other up? Most people assume that girls that attend college had enough of a fairly decent home training to attend in the first place. They probably don't have real deep daddy issues because they are in college and not on baby number 4. They must have some common sense unlike the hood chick that has chose to forgo college and is currently in line at the welfare office complaining about the wait. College girls turn into "wife" material, surely they wouldn't be all the way live with knives and shit trying to stab up women for whatever reason?

But they were. Not only were these women attending college, I don't think they were born and raised in the hood. These young girls came from stable homes. They appeared to have good parents and a pretty positive upbringing. So what made them stab someone to death?

I have a lot of different reasons. Some are mine, others were suggested by other people.

1. PMS - This one came from my coworker. She pretty much feels these girls are hormonal and just "snapping" at something that has built up and went off during that time of the month. I'm not sure I by it.

2. Hoodrats attending college now - When I tweeted this, a person I followed suggested that perhaps these women are hood chicks trying to improve their life. I guess that old "You can take them out, but you can't take it out of them" saying goes here. Not sure I buy this one either. But it could be a possibility.

3. Overly concerned with reputation and keeping it gangsta - true, most Black women feel like they gotta check every darn female in the world no matter what. Woman stares too long, punch her in the face. Woman don't like what you tweeted, show nude pics of her on twitter. The list goes on. Social media makes it so easy for people to be exposed for their true selves so most people feel they have to prove to everyone who they are. They never want to be called punk or whatever name they are going to be called. So not only hood chicks are concerned with street cred (they don't really tweet anyway), but the bougie, suburban raised girls feel like if they tell a story of punching someone in the face, they have to back it up.....so they have been, by stabbing up their peers.

4. These girls were raised by former hood women - Perhaps their mom's evolved. Moved from DC to PG county and put them in a Maryland suburban school, but the mother's hood identity never left. Perhaps these girls have seen their mothers act a fool and decided that's the way to handle things. *shrugs*

5. Not dealing with real emotions - (the reason I believe in the most) Black women have the hardest time admitting real emotions. They never want to be seen as soft. They aren't allowed to be sensitive. They have to be strong at all times. They only way to do this is to keep most shit bottled up. So when the time comes to lash out, they OVER lash out and end up doing too much expression all at once. The societal pressures that Black women experience are still very great and stressful. We have moved on from being the ugliest, dumbest, least money earners. Now we are expected to have great careers and succeed, and still run the whole damn household. Shit like this can build up on anyone and make them snap. I think younger Black women may experience pressure even more. Too many expectations have fallen on us. We can't do this, must do that and all the while being fucking happy about it. That's enough to make any woman want to just go off. Gladly, most of us don't. Even the hood chick.

Bottom line is, your generalizations about hood chicks is dumb. Your generalizations about bougie chicks are dumb. Generalizations are dumb. The issue with what these young Black women have done goes deeper than where they are from, who raised them or how they are raised. We Black women have to learn to cope in other ways than violence, and we have to be open to expression of hurtful emotions without worrying about ridicule from out peers. Otherwise, we'll just keep stabbing each other up.

I'm just saying

By the way, I'm from the hood, attended college, was orphaned and never stabbed a single soul in my life.

Titty Avatars = Winning...

I love avatars, profile pictures, whatever you want to call them. They show us what you look like. Puts a face to a name. Avatars are very influential. They can influence whether or not we want to creep into your DM and possibly hit that, follow you back or delete you simply because you are unattractive.

These avatars are not only meant to put a face to a name, but they are also meant to represent you and who you are. Some of us use touched up picture, some bathroom pictures which happens to make everyone look extra attractive. (Hmm, must be the lighting) Some of use comical shit or something that isn't us at all. All of this is fine and good.

There are also the avatars that get heat. That get shitted on. Avatars that gain followers. Avatars that lose followers. Avatars that either get glorified or criticized. These are the titty/ass/sexy man chest avatars.

We like the titty avatars cause, well, it's titties. Juicy, sexy, pretty titties. We like scrolling down the timeline to see the luscious titties every time we tweet something. Some of these have a face attached and some don't. Either way, we enjoy them.

We like the booty avatars. These usually belong to strippers, nude models and/or porn stars. We enjoy those as well. Nothing like seeing a nice, well photoshopped booty on your timeline. Some of these booty shots though are not from models and strippers. Some women choose to booty toot in a picture of them before going out. They know they are blessed in this area and want to show it. Hey, we like admiring.

Sexy man chest avatars are just that. Men who work hard, pump iron and can take their shirts off and display their assets as their avatar. We women (and some men) enjoy those as well. Hell this is the reason some of us women follow their asses, just because of the avatar.

Most tweeters like these types of profile pictures. Again we are human and it's pretty nice to enjoy the beautiful body parts of another follower.

Then, there are the others.....

People who don't like these avatars. People who find the body parts avatars tasteless, tacky, showing too much and not attractive. They unfollow and block you if you show too much skin in your profile pic. They subtweet you, take to calling you names, calling you out. They put you down. Call you insecure, say you don't love yourself BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Usually the women calling these avatars out or hating them are either too old too look that good anymore in an avatar, not attractive enough for the avatar, or basically on some fake ass feminist shit because they can't get a man and need some kind of way to feel better about their looks. Touting a woman who has a sexy body part in their avi as "insecure" is a way to make them feel superior, cause let's face it, no one wants to look at their titties or ass.
Personally I think a woman who is proud enough of her sexy attribute should flaunt it IF SHE PLEASES. If you do not wish to show your sexiness in that manner, why does it bother you if another woman does it AND gets attention for it? It's not doing anyone a disservice but your own self esteem. I'm sure they don't care if you follow them or not nor are they trying to prove something to you.

This isn't 1800s. We are no longer only viewed as sexual objects. We are sexual objects with brains now. We can be smart and sexy at the same time. We don't have to choose one over the other to prove a point. No, being smart as shit doesn't make you attractive as a woman no more than being only smart makes an ugly ass dude attractive. Only a liar would admit to preferring women covered up in an avatar.

I don't see the big deal with getting compliments from people on how sexy your avi is or how nicely shaped your booty is IF YOU SO CHOOSE, but it doesn't mean lack of self esteem no more than it means you have the highest self esteem for NOT showing your titties. I sometimes wonder if a woman who NEVER flaunts her physical assets is the one suffering from low self esteem.

Either way..old, probably not attractive women, let them women show their titties and ass and sexy moufs and all that good shit on twitter. What is it to you? Don't hate cause you don't look good enough to show yours. And don't try and discourage them not to show their wonderful cleavage because it will make you feel  better physically.

As for the men, stop hating on men that work out and have nice chests and chiseled abs. Showing your sexy chest in your avi does not making you gay. Get yo asses in the gym, pump some iron, then feel free to use your sexy chest as an avatar. You can send me the picture of your progress for prior approval to your posting the pics to my Gmail :-)

Things You Will Learn When You Reach 30+

I follow quite a bit of people on twitter. All age groups, sexualities, genders, levels of attractiveness and education. The list goes on.

Nothing is more exciting yet also more annoying than the 20 somethings I follow's proclamations.

They avow to never fall in love with the wrong person (again). 

They announce they will never get a pregnant out of wedlock. 

They always telling us what they will and won't do. What they have and have not accepted. 

They are determined to be these "successful", highly intelligent, non fallible human beings who are so great they are beyond "error". In fact, I think a few of them may view themselves as super human. 

Some even compare themselves to other "successful" 20 somethings and get "depressed" or feel the need to feel bad about who they are or lack of accomplishments.

I was asked by a fellow tweeter to chill on the knocking the 20 somethings. And I think I have. I didn't realize I was annoying with it. 

With that said, this isn't a "knocking the young people down" post. More so, I'm trying to offer insight into what about you may change once you realize your dreams didn't materialize. That you weren't married or on your way to marriage before 30. That that one time you got down and dirty with homie you ended up being a single parent. That you do not own property and that everyone else around  you seems to be doing much better. 

That's life. Unfortunately, while yall youngins out there boasting about what you will and won't do, shit is still happening in life whether you like it or control it or not. But when it does happen, you will learn faster than a speeding bullet that you will cope and be just fine if not better for it. 

When you reach 30 you:

Stop caring about what your "peers" think - I see this a lot on twitter. People worried about their friends seeing pics, texts, tweets. Their peers seeing drunken behavior or them acting out of character. They overly concern themselves with how other 20 somethings will view them. I know part of this is you are still trying to find out who you are and you want others to know who you are as well. The other reason is that you are still dead set on finding that perfect mate for marriage. You don't want them to think you are a loser or hoe bag. Let me tell you, when you reach 30ish, you start giving less of a fuck what anyone thinks of you. You would have already gone thru a relationship or 2 that taught you very well that a lot of people can't be trusted and most people aren't shit. You start focusing on your own happiness more and doing what makes you laugh and smile and less of trying to impress others with your accomplishments and attitude. 

You realize that other people aren't as successful as they say they are - a whole lot of people do a whole lot of faking. It's not exclusive to youngins but it seems to be their forte. Twitpicing and facebook faking about what they have bought, where they have been, where they are going and what they are doing. Some of us know these people offline and KNOW they ain't really about shit. The older you get and the more you learn about life, the more you know that a lot of people talk just to be talking. They are in competition with you. They keep the "bad shit" in the closet to make it seem like all that glitters IS in fact gold. But you know they still live with moms, and that's how they can afford to take trips once a month. They aren't paying any rent. When you get older and see the real person people are, then you think less of trying to be like them. 

Shit's expensive and nothing is guaranteed - Owning a home costs more than you think. A lot of renters feel that if they can afford rent, they can afford a mortgage. They have a decent steady job, good income, so they dive into homeownership again to impress people. Know this, when you rent, you can call maintenance to fix shit. When you own you gotta call someone from the yellow pages. When you rent, your other bills are reduced, to own, electric is higher, you gotta pay property taxes, water bill and homeowners fees. A few months after settling on that house, you lose your job. Your company decided your position is no longer needed. You think you'll find a job in 6 weeks, after all, you got your graduate degree. But alas, the economy is still doing bad and it's taking longer than you thought. You spent all your savings on your home's down payment. What the fuck are you going to do?!?!?!!? After you have seen your friends lose jobs or have lost one yourself for whatever reason, you realize that getting your degree, not having kids out of wedlock and doing everything in it's proper order guarantees you NOTHING at all. It may assist your "success" and help you meet your goals easier, I will say that, but it doesn't guarantee that shit will not go so wrong to the point that you will consider ending your life. I have both experienced and seen this shit. Shit happens. Once you get past one shitty event you realize you can get past another. Suddenly, that Benz doesn't mean as much as it did before, you're just happy to have wheels and smile as you push the unlock button on that Ford Focus. You clip coupons and start styling your own hair. Something you wish you would have done years ago to save money. 

You're not as young as you used to be - Nothing worse than when I see 30 somethings in my timeline or damn near acting like 20 somethings. Still trying to get white girl wasted. Still going to homecoming yard fests. Still shopping faithfully at Rainbow and Level X. Still outchea trying to get all up in VIP and party till they pass out. One day you will wake up at the club, look around you, and realize you look a damn fool. All those young people in there and you know damn well you don't belong. You leave the club at 1:00 am and go straight to sleep. And you are OKAY with this for the most part. You take a look at your life and wonder what the hell you have been doing. You didn't write that book like you said you would, you didn't start your company, you are getting more tired at the end of the day. Shoot you even debate going to happy hour when you KNOW it was a given that you would be there at least 3 times a week. You are tired of the hangovers, of not knowing where you woke up or knowing where you woke up and start screaming. You have finally realized you are no longer 25 and shit has to change. You start focusing on your goals again and remembered that you promised yourself that you had planned on doing this sooner than later. You are now over 30 and you can't do most of the shit that you did at 25 anymore. Where did those 5 years go?!?!?

Things don't go as planned - I know some people who planned their life and didn't deviate from it. They carried out every single thing to a tee. But oops, the condom broke or oops, your man likes men or oops you are still 35, unmarried and childless. Or worse, you were married, and had to get a divorce. But you can't believe this has happened to you. This happens to everyone else but you. You had your shit together. You kept your credit score up. You went to college twice. You work out, keep your weave tight, own shit. Why they fuck isn't your life the way you planned it? Simply put, that's not life. Sadly, you won't realize this until you realize it into your 30's. It's your 30th birthday and instead of celebrating with your husband and infant child, you are in the club (again) with your other friends drinking and hoping that dude you've been hollering at will hit you up before the night is over. 

None of this is to depress anyone. It's to set the record straight. Of course some of you will have perfect lives and everything will be perfectly played out for you. But for most of us, that's not a reality. I feel at times we judge others too harshly for nothing having storybook lives before we've even lived ourselves. This is merely a warning to the reality check you will soon be getting. 

But while you are still in your 20s, please PLEASE enjoy them. Pretty soon life will really happen and will be staring you dead in the face. 

Or you can be pathetic and run from it and fake like you'll be 25 forever. 

Up to you *shrug*