WHY HE WONT SLEEP WITH YOU

Hello Blog Readers. Sorry for my forced Hiatus, but I have been blocked from using the internet (as much) and my pc is broken from downloading pron because I used it too much so I have had limited access to bless you with my wonderful life philosophies (don’t laugh)




I don’t even remember what made me think of this specific topic, because I had written down to write this blog on a sticky weeks before. But I do still remember the reasons I came up with and hopefully the fellas will join in and make this topic even more informing and enjoyable.



WHY HE WON’T SLEEP WITH YOU



Ladies, the mood seems perfect. You played the good girl role for weeks and you are ready, most likely you are drunk and the opportunity has presented itself. You are ready, willing and able to get it on. You bat your lashes, lay on his chest, give him the eye. Wait..what’s happening. He isn’t taking the bait. “What’s wrong?” you wonder. You don’t dare seem sluttish and ask right out why he aint trying to smash. You simply let him walk out your door leaving you sexually frustrated. You try and analyze the situation through and through. You don’t even want to discuss it with your girls cause you are ashamed that someone didn’t want to go there with you. But you still need answers



Well fret no more, True is here to help.



There are several different reasons why that man aint trying to smash. I have heard numerous things from numerous males over the years. I don’t even know if they want me to even reveal this info, but yall know me. I am going to let it all out.

These reasons are in no particular order..so read them or take them as you may and be prepared to fix the situation.



1. You aint smell right - yup, it could be as simple as him not liking your smell. True, some men don’t care how you smell, they just want to get it in. No other man has had a problem smashing. Perhaps you shoulda jumped in the shower, or taken a bird bath or something. Perhaps it’s deeper than that and you need to see your gyn. I’m telling you tho, IMO this is one of the main reasons he aint hit.

2. He just got some from somewhere else – or he going to get some after leaving you. Either way, he doesn’t want to tire himself out or be a wack lay. Think about what time he came over, was it super late, super early. Aww hell, it doesn’t matter. Chances are he is too tired to screw your brains out as well or he saving his energy for later.



3. He isn’t physically attracted to you. – Men do it to. They hang out with women they think are cool and nice. They aren’t REALLY into you like that. You are something to do to kill time. It may be the way you are shaped or lack of assets, but for whatever reason, he won’t get it up for you.



You know what, since men rarely turn down cooter, I can’t come up with any other reasons. Don’t take it personal ladies, if you know you are fly in all these departments, chances are its not just you, but the feminine part of you he doesn’t want if you know what I mean.



Ladies, have you ever been turned down for sex? Fellas ever turned down a woman who was offering? Why? Please share

How to get out of obligatory s*x

Don’t act like ya’ll don’t know what I am talking about. Ladies this post is for you. I don’t know too many men who don’t

Obligatory Sex: Sex usually women (and some men) have to have after dating someone for several weeks or months.

Picture it. You have been seeing this guy for a few weeks or months. He has spent quite a bit of money on taking you out on dates. You may have even let him get a good night kiss. Truth is, you like him, but you still don’t like him like him. But you know eventually he is going to want to go all the way. You dread the day he calls you after some time and asks can he come over or will you visit him. You avoided this by saying at first that its too soon and you don’t let people over your house or go over their’s this early on in the relationship. That won’t fly anymore. He is coming to collect. Its time for you guys to get it on. Again, you aren’t feeling him like that.  (You find out he has a small peen)
 What to do.

You may want to keep the “friendship” going as long as you can because it does have its benefits. So simply saying “I never plan on having sex with you” isn’t going to fly. You don’t’ want to burn your free meal bridge and hang out partner bridge.

So what to do what to do. Well fear not. True is here to help. With my tips, you will be able to successfully get out of having obligatory s*x yet still enjoy the company of your friend.

1. Say you are about to have your period or say you are already having it. Nothing turns a man off quicker than saying “I’m bloated and crampy”. This is tricky cause you have to make sure you go out with him around the same time. He will start to clock your cycle.

2. Fake like you are extremely tired – OMG my girl is seeing someone she isn’t romantically interested in. She enjoys hanging with him but doesn’t want to take it there. He asked to come over one night, she yawned and said “sure but I’m tired” I guess he decided to test her cause sure nuff he went over there. When he got there she had every single light out in the house and was deep in bed under the covers talking jibberish. He conceded and left stating “dang you really are tired.” After he left, she got up to watch television. GENIUS lol The problem with this is he will try to come earlier and earlier, so remember to try not to let him visit until really late at night cause you had something to do after work. *wink

3. Say you have a condom allergy – if he asks to put it in anyway and claims he is disease free, tell him that you are offended that he would say that. He’ll feel so bad about offending you and not being understanding he’ll probably never ask you for sex again waiting patiently until you are ready (which of course is never). Yes he may suggest getting tested together, simply stall your test results forever until you don’t want to see him anymore.

4. Claim you don’t want to have sex until you have been seeing eachother a year – This most likely will go good cause he will continue to befriend you and take you out while waiting thinking that you are a virtuous woman. Meanwhile, you are simply just getting your freak on elsewhere.

Ladies, have you ever had to get out of obligatory sex before? Fellas? Everyone please share :)

Now to my male readers, I know some of these excuses may seem harsh, and you probably really believe that woman when she said she didn’t want to have sex with you, cause clearly any woman wants to have sex with you simply because you showed her a good time and you are MALE. Lol.

Nah seriously, get off that ego stuff. We may like you as a friend but we know that as a friend you won’t treat us special like we like and especially not take us out to dinner.

Now have fun commenting on this post..I know its going to be some angry “Just be honest” comments


But being honest all the time takes the fun out of life at times

Are We Taking Social Apps Too Seriously? Should We Be?

When I first joined Myspace, I thought it was fun place to hang out on the internet. Pics were up of ppl having a good time or hamming it up. You got to see peoples families and hear some music from their page. Then I noticed that people started doing some arguing over baby momma drama and high school threats were being made. I stopped going on myspace and entered the new social realm of Facebook.

Ah a break from the arguing and teen drama. Facebook appeared mature with no applications for music and other ghetto things going on. Facebook started off innocent enough, but like MySpace, soon people were arguing back and forth, airing other people’s business and just being TMI. UGH..I was bored with it.

Then I got into twitter. Wow, people were having good debates on twitter, starting funny trend topics without all the extra BS. Then even that started to turn into a nightmare when you had celebs like Mashonda (swizz beats ex wife) deciding to use twitter to express and give us details about her crumbling marriage. (Ugh, I think some things should just be private)

I myself was subjected to the seriousness of twitter when I had a really good friend unfollow me for no apparent reason (no..NOT HER…my real good friend I had for YEARS)

I don’t get it. I though applications like twitter were supposed to be FUN! Now it seems people are using them instead of communicating in person. They are using twitter to express their dislike and like for someone. People are using twitter to curse out people and start beef. Drama kings and queens use twitter to play the victim and get some co-signs. People use twitter to show their relationship status. People talk all about their kids on twitter. I just personally think some of this is TOO MUCH. What happened to being lighthearted on social apps?

I know I made a previous post on why can’t you find love on twitter. But finding love and relationships on twitter is fun, declaring your dislike or disdain for someone SERIOUSLY is NOT!! PERIOD!!! (I mean really…I express hatred towards a few of the ppl I follow but its not that serious for me. It’s all shyts and giggles)

I guess we are moving more and more towards communicating with people on these social applications and less in person. I guess our society is truly transforming towards an all digital communicating society. It has to be. Why else would you stop following someone on twitter because they said something you didn’t like? Why else would people use social applications to really and truly express something super personal towards someone? Why else would companies check twitter and Facebook prior to hiring you?

I mean come on. I just scroll past the posts I’m not interested in reading. I have un-followed people who seemed to be only spammers, but that’s just about it. You don’t have to be my friend for me to follow you on twitter. You don’t have to follow me for me to follow you. Hell, I don’t really have to “like” you to follow you. I am on twitter to past the time, to express dumb stuff, maybe vent a tiny bit about general things, to make people laugh, to laugh at other people, and to debate. I am not on twitter to make friends (although I have met some really cool folk from twitter). I am not on twitter to show how popular I am or get more attention.

But I guess I’m probably the only one who feels this way or one of the few.

Folks, are social apps replacing human face to face contact? Are social apps a reliable way to have serious personal communication with someone? Should twitter and other social apps be taken seriously since as a society we are using them more and more to communicate?

What does everyone think?

Master The Art of Multi-Dating - My Second Guest Blogger EVER!!! I LOVE GUESTS !!!!

Hello All,



FYI, I'm not really on a hiatus, its that I normally blog from work, but since I'm out in the open of the office now *coughsomeonesnitchedcough* I won't be blogging as often, not until I replace or repair my PC. So..anyways, I asked a good Blogger friend of mine to write a blog about Dating in DC..after all she is the DCDATINGDIVA (her blog dcdatingadventures.blogspot.com )



So give it up for my girl, please read, enjoy and print it out
 
 
*******************************************************
 
Master The Art of Multi-Dating
 
Yes, you can! Remember that??? Well pull it back out, cause yes, YOU too, can be the ultimate multi-tasker. I learned at an early age how to “kill two birds with one stone”. Not that I am a bird killer, but I’m all about making the most of my day. I do need time to consume my vodka, well now, I’ve switched my favorite drink, but that’s another subject.

Diva what are you talking about????


Well DATING of course! I want you to improve your dating life! I decided it’s ok for me to reveal a couple of my secrets. Here’s one. You too can go on three (or more, if you got it like that) dates in one day, and still have time for the gym, a nap, or shoe shopping! Here’s how.


First, make sure you have options. When going out, I like to keep my options open, and not schedule long dates, especially first dates. The longest a first date should be is MAX 2 hours. If it’s someone who you’ve been out with before & enjoy their company, well that’s different...and yes, I’ve broken this rule a few times, and trust me, it wasn’t always pretty...I’ve learned from my mistake...


Second, make sure plans are made in advance. DO NOT make last minute plans with someone. If he (or she) is calling or texting you that afternoon, to see what you are doing that night...DON’T DO IT!!! You have a social life, remember? Make sure they are cognizant of your time too.



Third, maximize your lunch hour. Ummm perfect way to have a quickie, and still have the evening free.


Happy hour. Enough said. Be sure to let your “potential” know that you have plans or “something to do” at 7:30pm, but you would love to meet them for drinks at 5:30pm. After you escape happy hour... go & enjoy dinner with the number one draft pick. If you are on that super plan, and are not worn out...you can always schedule a “dessert” date for 9:30pm.



Doing the plan on a Saturday or Sunday??? Maximize your day with brunch dates, afternoon movie or museum dates, and of course, don’t forget to squeeze in that nap, so you’re well rested for your evening festivities...

Diva “Cause I love to spread joy & happiness when I can, and drink vodka...”

EZ STREET PRESENTS: THICK VS. THINNESS PERSPECTIVES & BEYOND SHOW

In case you missed it, Your's truly was one of the guest panelists on EZSTREETSHOW.COM

Click the link to hear me discuss body image, male preferences and self esteem issues in the black community

http://ezstreetshow.com/2009/11/09/ez-street-presents-thick-vs-thinness-perspectives-beyond-show/

They are moving my seat

Monday I will be moving to a new seat. My new desk is the most out in the open desk in the whole office. I can no longer tweet, blog, IM, Gchat  or anything of that nature during work hours unless its lunch. Thanks for your patience..I will miss you as much as you miss me #lies LMFAO

Anyhoo...keep reading tho..i'll b posting

CRAZY!!!! MAN SHE CRAZY!!! (That ninja crazy girls don't say nuffin to em)

Being the outgoing and loud very social person I am often accused of being "crazy". I easily get offended by that comment as I don't like being associated with people that belong in mental hospitals or your random jump off bish that keeps calling your job or follows you on twitter so that she can see if you are cheating. I am appaulled that you would lump me in the same category as that crazy man that stands on the corner cussing out everyone as they walk past. I ahbor being associated with a serial killer or sociopath. "I AM NOT CRAZY!!!" I always end up yelling at people. Just because a person is loud doesn't make them crazy. Just because a person is quiet doesn't mean they are not crazy.

I grow tired of explaining that I am not the type of crazy they call me. That there are several levels of crazy, several different types of crazy. Each of has some sort of crazy in us whether it be some form of delusional "I am better than you" to the people with OCD that bad that they can't leave the house without fixing their pant cuffs over and over. I am very prepared to educate you about what's really crazy and what really isn't in this post.

1. Violent Crazy - This "crazy" person is easily upsettable(<--prolly not a word). No matter what the situation, they will result to violence as the end result. They constantly talk about kicking your ass, your momma's ass, and your grandmomma's ass if it boils down to it. They are extremely intimidating. They may grunt as the walk past instead of talk. Violent crazy will use a weapon to kick your ass. You will probably black out from the ass whooping they dish out on you. This type of crazy will knock you out over the last peice of chicken. Trust, you don't want to be on their bad side. You definitely don't want to be around when 2 extremely angry crazy people are fighting. It may prove to be fatal. You can easily tell the Violent crazy cause they are always fighting or getting ready to. Someone is always holding them back from fighting.

2. Stalker Crazy - You know who he/she is. This person doesn't give you any breathing space. At first you think the obsession with you is really adorable and cute.But then later you realize that it isn't affection they are giving you after you walk in and see the shrine they created in your honor.When you do realize that they have some screws loose, your life immediately turns into a lifetime movie. Fellas if you try to break if off with a stalker crazy woman she will claim pregnancy. Your dumb ass will believe her then have unprotected sex with her making her pregnant anyway. (dummy). Women, the stalker crazy guy will say he'll kill himself and you if he can't have you. He will follow you around, call your phone all the time. Men, the Stalker crazy girl will slash your tires, break your windows, and fight every single biatch she sees you with, even your momma. No matter how long yall been broken up you will always be their man/woman. The clear indication of the stalker crazy as I said in the beginning of the paragraph is that are extremely attached to you too soon. That is a big red flag. STAY AWAY or direct them to the nearest mental health clinic. Clearly they have abandonment issues.

3. Needy/emotional crazy - Obviously this person starts off as the good girl/boy. They are very sweet to you, they are always there when you need and the sex with this type of crazy person is BANANAS. One night tho, you stay out an extra hour later with your folks hanging out, after that your life is living HELL. They start going through your phone, accusing you of having relationships with everyone of the opposite sex you address. They  go through your pockets and are always accusing you of cheating. They never want you to go anywhere or do anything without them. If you want some me time, they threaten to leave you, but by then, you so peen/poon whipped you will do anything to keep them. Most of the time they are pleasent to be around, but soon as you dont answer your phone one time, its on an popping. They are famous for doing drop bys at your house, job or even your mans and nem crib looking for you. They tend to be desperate for marriage. Needy/emotional crazy have some self acceptance issues, maybe abandoment issues and possibly daddy/mommy issues. They attach to just about anyone that pays them the time of day, so don't feel that special.

Those up there are some definitions of whats "crazy". Those people clearly are people that maybe need counseling and/or maturity and should be avoided if you can. Clearly I am not any of those...okay..I lie. I used to be the violent one, but I am moving away from that.

There is some behavior that mistakenly gets the "crazy" label. Let me not say that..lemme say that its a different definition of crazy. This is the type of crazy that is based on your personality, not by your actions. Thats the just the way that person it. It doesn't mean they are like the crazy people stated above.

1. The outspeaker - This person is always saying something ALL THE TIME. Often called "ghetto" their mouths run longer than your refridgerator. They cannot shut up to save their lives. They say the most off the wall shyt that will either have you in stitches or questioning what kind of mind they have. The outspeaker is almost always mistaken as being Crazy because they are outgoing and very social. They get called the "crazy" in the Martin Lawrence "YOU SO CRAZY" way..but they really just like to have fun, and aren't ashamed of doing it out in the open. Its sad that people think you are crazy just because you have no shame *shrugs*. ..I couldn't care any less. Be you and have fun. Not all of us are concerned with what people think.

2. The Cusser outter - This person is easily annoyed by most people. They aren't afraid to tell you exactly how annoyed they are with you and they often get loud. They have no cut cards and are completly bluntly honest with everything. The cusser outter may appear to be the Violent Crazy, but chances are, they won't get physical with you. They just enjoy telling people off. They can be quiet as shyt until you annoy them, but most of the time, they are as loud talking as the outspeaker.

3. The extra quiet person - They are mistaken as crazy cause they never say ANYTHING. There is an old saying that the quiet ones are the ones you need to look out for. But thats not always the case. They are just quiet, observant, and dont like to draw attention to themselves. They are just reserved. It doesn't mean they are sitting there plotting the next terrorist attack. Just cause they are quiet doesn't mean they are stuck up or don't want to talk. They aren't engagers like the outspeaker. Go over there and talk to them, they are cool folks.

What other definitions of crazy can you think of? What type of "crazy" do you think I am? Remember this post was supposed to be light hearted. I dont need no one pulling out their DSM-V and shyt trying to "educate me" on the real definition of crazy... I HATE IT

and

IM NOT CRAZY !!!!!!

PEEN POST Part 2!!! HOW TO FISH OUT A BIG ONE!!

I guess you all are wondering why I need a part 2 this post when clearly part 1 was TMI enough information. The discussion I had at the bar the other day with my girls garnered a question.

HOW DO YOU TELL HOW BIG A MANS PEEN IS?

They asked me this because for the most part I am a big peen magnet. Sure I have attracted smaller peens in my life, but for the most part, the men I engage with have a 3rd leg are very well endowed.

I have come up with several ways that a woman can predict what a man is working with. Yes these will be very ignorant..but so is a post on PEEN to begin with.

How to tell if its big:

1. You are mean to him, yet he still pursues you - Get this, True doesn't like anyone...she hates mostly everything that includes people. I'm very quick to decline someone directly to their face.  I remember I was sitting at my fav spot ignoring the SHYT  and carrying my boy (DC term, means to DIS) and everything. He still kept asking for my number. Finally I gave in. We were friends MONTHS before we did anything, I found out he was hung like stocking. GOSH. After that I started doing caculations in my head. The guys I gave the hardest time to were the guys who turned out to be the ones who need the biggest bottle of lotion to self pleasure. My theory is that big peen men are used to women sweating them for their peen, they like a challenge. They want to "shut you up with their peen" if I may. Small peen men dont like rejection when they first meet. It's bad enough you gon reject the size of their peen, they are already defeated, they want to deal with it in the bedroom as well, so they won't go forward with pursuing you.

2. The Dance Test - you are in the club/bar/lounge/caberet and you are dancing with a dude. If he has a big one..(hell if he has a medium one) you will feel it. But with the big ones..you will REALLY REALLY feel it. I mean it won't be subtle. You will feel that hardness and jump and run across the room like he tried to prod your booty like an alien. 

3. He brags about the size - this is something else I have noticed. A guy with a cucumber in his pants will be quick to tell you what he is working with. He may even be jesting with you or funning. But it has proven true to me 99% of the time that when a guy says he is working with enough to feed a hungry village of whores, then its true. *sigh..flashbacks*

4. He has kids by different women - This is probably the most ignorant. *Shout out to all the guys sporting Kick stands for their torso's in their pants who aren't spreading their seed with just any and everyone.* It seems thoough that men that have multiple baby mothers have one thing in common...LARGE PEEN. A clearer clue is if he has never been married to any of them. For some reason, women lose their uteruses trying to keep the big peen man. *smh*


I feel like I have to make a separate list from this detailing what doesn't mean SHYT when figuring out peen size

• Obviously because he buys Trojan Magnums - That don't mean diddly squat fool. Do you know we can see ur peen? We know you dont really need magnums. Next time get lifestyles..thats wack.

• If he say he gon tear that ass up - Umm...you have a jalepeno peen, what are you going to "tear it up" with, do you plan on fisting? #imjustsaying

• He goes out of his way to get your cooter from you. - He will travel by bus, train, plane, fly you down there, all to get some of ur coota. Thats cause he self conscious about the size, doesn't like to be turned down to his face and figures he runs to you get get laid, you will go through with it. Big peen men are used to women calling them for some action. Small peen men dont get many call backs *sorry but true* Come to think about it, I dont know one big peen man thats thirsty for coochie.*pauses*...nope...NONE.  Tri - leggers tend to not be wanting for coochie

Now yall know these aren't gospel, just my observations on peen and men. Try some of them out tho...you may be suprised *ahem* at what you find out *winks* So if you haven't had big peen yet, or want big peen, use some of my tips at weeding out ones without one..it may work.

and..Im out..I dont think I can do this anymore....specially since I'm not getting any *frowns*

PEEN POST PART 1 !!! 5 Different Types of PEEN!!!

Last night I went to my favorite (and THEE BEST) happy hour spot, Laughing Man. My girls and I were discussing the lack of peen we have in our lives and why. We all discovered the main reason we were forced into decided to be celibate. WACK  UNSATISFACTORY PEEN.

This post will have 2 parts. The first part is, as titled, describing the different types/sizes of peen.

I'm not going to lie. True2me has seen her fair share of peen. The funny thing is, I didn't even have sex with all this peen. Most men volunteer their peen up for approval and review. Its really easy to find out what kinda peen you are working with, but thats part two of the peen post.

I wish I could post picks of the peen, I'll use some other graphics in place (keep in mind these are estimates, some peens are short and wide, some long and skinny, this is just a general idea of what peen a man is working with).

Let's get started

1. Baby Peen - When you see this peen you ask "Is it hard" (true story). It truly resembles your pinky finger. There is no width nor length to it AT ALL. The good part about this type of peen is that they WILL EAT THE COOTER. They will take their time to get you all aroused and what not. Shyt, these bammas will probably wine and dine the hell out of you first. They have to get you to like them some kinda way. The baby peen man is quick to settle down. Quick to get you all up into them so they can have someone accepting them for their lil peen. The bad part, when you have sex with them, you can't feel it. PERIOD. *sigh*. You'd have more fun with your tampon.

2. Smedium (small/medium) peen - The smedium peen is not too far from the baby peen. The difference is you can CLEARLY tell that a smedium peen is in fact a peen. Smedium peen men tend to be women labelers. They feel bad about not being endowed so they find ways to make woman feel more inferior. I know you are wondering why baby peen doesn't do this. Well its cause baby peen is so small they can't afford to have women turn them down in any way. Smedium peen feel like they have some leverage cause they got a little more peen that baby peen. The good part about smedium peen is that he too likes to give head, bad part, he'll slip out of you too much *sigh*

3. Average Peen - For some women, average peen is the best type of peen to have. You can take it, you can feel it, see it, and you can save that man some embarassment by not busting out laughing when he pulls it out. The average peen man tends to be in limbo with dating. He is like the baby peen in the sense that he's really nice and considerate to women. But he does that because sex for him is awesome. He is big enough to please you, but not too big to send you running. The pros of the average peen, he has a great sex life and will have no problem doing whatever in the bedroom. The cons, he's most likely a player and won't stick around long (sorry ladies)

4. Above Average Peen - for the ladies that may have had a kid or two or just like a little more challenge in the bedroom, the above average peen is PERFECT. Its a perfect width and lenth. You will feel the shyt out of this peen in your cooter. With this peen, you won't need much other stimulation because the peen itself will do most of the work. Sometimes the Above Average peen man doesn't realize that he is packing more than most. For some inexperienced women, they will think this is the biggest peen they ever seen (damn I should be a rapper..). He has the best peen to ride because he will never slip out. If you're an internal orgasm girl and want to keep your uterus, this is the best peen to have. The con, if they know what they are working with, they are less likely to give head *frowns*

5. Humungous Hungus Peenasauras (aka HUGE PEEN) - This is the pron star peen. This peen is so big you can't believe its real. When he pulls it out, you wonder if you are on the set of snakes on a plane. This is the peen you dream about in your fantasy, but never expected it to be in your face. Its so pretty and thick you are tempted to suck him off right there, but you rethink it cuz I'm telling you, Huge peen man DOES NOT GIVE HEAD (okay...I take that back, they will if they are really REALLY into you, but most don't ) But bump that, who needs head when he can tap all the nerves in your cooter and send you climbing up the wall to high heaven (if you can take it). Ladies, your first time with huge peen WILL HURT, especially if you are used to smedium peen or average peen. If you are not a head giving pro, do not attempt to place the huge peen in your mouth, no man wants scrapes and scratches and what not on their peen. TEETH HURT. Their downfall tho is pulling out their peen and scaring the life out of a woman to the point where she won't want to do it. They are usually really cocky and don't chase women, mostly because they know what they are working with. They won't be needy, they may not even call you after they bone  you (hey i'm just saying). But its worth the one night stand with these fellas. Its a rite of passage for women. But take this one slow ladies

*watches all the men run to pull their pants down and compare their peen to the pics*

LMFAO..Have fun with this post..

Why the Desperation???

Picture this, you are 25, finishing grad school, working well in corporate america as well as with your side business. You keep your weave tight, your wardrobe great. You go to church, and act like a lady at all times. So why are you still single? You start a blog asking why. You read some other young dumb guys blog as to why you are single. You research and make excuses and try to find SOME REASON that you are single. I mean you have all  your other goals met. Now its time to meet that special someone to prove to the world that you are the complete package. That your life isn't in order. But...again, you are still single.

It saddens me that some of you broads life's mission is to become someone's wife. Alot of you went to college to either meet your husband or become better wife material. You bought your own house and car as soon as you could so you could prove your independance and that you don't want him for his money. You spend 1000s of dollars on keeping up your appearance. You fret and start to worry and make millions of posts on relationships and reasons why he's not marrying you. My question is: Why do you want a husband so bad.  So soon, so early. Aren't you happy enough with your accomplishments to chill and bask in them a while. Is it because you are looking for validation from society, as a woman.

Men you aren't exempt either, but I think  you just have a little more patience when it comes to settling down, so I'm not going to hard on you in this post..for now...

I have thought of a few reasons as to why women (shyt some men too for the most part) are super desperate for marriage, a life partner, a mate. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with wanting a life long companion, it just seems this generation is OBSESSED with it. Its like everything they do in life leads up to finding a life long mate.

What makes us drool over the idea of having a husband?:

1. Just because its another goal - You succeeded at all your other goals. You are successful. You have proven yourself a valuable member of society. This is just another thing to scratch off your list. Just something else to accomplish. Ask yourself the real reason WHY you want a husband so bad. Think about it..REALLY THINK.

2. Fear - Fear of being alone. Fear of being unloved. Fear that no one will want you. You become desperate to prove that you are marriage material. That someone will and can love you. You need someone else to commit to you to so you won't be the only friend w/o a mate or the lonley cat/dog lady. You gotta show your worth to men by having one of your own.

3. Insecurity - You aren't happy with just yourself. Think about all the friends you have. Think about all the family. You just aren't used to it just being you. You may even be a serial dater. Having had 5 long term relationships in the past 10 years. You feel like you aren't NOTHING unless someone of the oppposite sex says that they want you.

4. Daddy issues - your dad left you as a little girl so you didn't have a man in your life telling you were beautiful, worthy, special, needed. You didn't have that man giving you the self esteem you needed. So you feel like you gotta run out and get a man to feel valued.

What this society has taught us is that we need men to validate us. We go by their labels. We try so hard not to be seen as promiscuous. We try to act "perfect" at all times so that men won't see us in a negative light. All so we can meet a husband. This society has taught us that nothing is more important to a woman than having men accept you. As all my readers know..I EFFING HATE IT.

Think about it, you have all that I stated in the first paragraph. You probably have great friends. You have already accomplished a lot. Why on EARTH would you still be desparate for ANY MAN. You have plenty of time. You are not even 30 yet. You dont even know who you are, let alone who you want or need in your life.

Desparation leads to making bad decisions. You marry some dude and find out you can't stand him. You put up with all his shyt for the sake of saying you have a man. You cannot and will not be one of those women without a man. You listen to your man when he says "baby you better than them cause you have a man"

Ladies, we dont "need" them as much as our mothers did. Sure the "best" way to start a family and have kids is through marriage (I have my other views on that, but will leave it alone for now). But why are on earth are we trying to do this as soon as possible. Why don't we "sew our oats" like men? I know we dont have forever to make babies, but that's fine. You don't have to do it today. Live your life, find out who you are. Travel the world. You will meet someone.

Take your time ladies..be happy with yourself. Mr. Right will come along eventually. And he will love you for YOU and not who for who you made yourself to be to please him.